WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
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