it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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