You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
