Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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