His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Randomize
