Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
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