after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
