Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Randomize
