so explain again why im purple
no
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
