Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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