I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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