There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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