You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
