smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
