Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize
