Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize
