It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
