i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Randomize
