You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
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