i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
You ate ashes out of my bong
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
