You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
I forget how to act sober
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
