idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
