So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
