she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
He shit in the fireplace
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
