sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
