Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
My ass is underappreciated
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
