What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Randomize
