I'm really into asian looking animals
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
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