I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
