I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
