IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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