I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize