Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
