Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Randomize
