who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Randomize
