at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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