You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Randomize
