We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
My dick has a subreddit
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Randomize
