The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
