He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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