btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
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