It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
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