Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Randomize
