I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
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