He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
