Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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