What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
