I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Randomize
