We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Randomize
