For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
