I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Randomize
